Introduction to How to Manifest Love
Today I’m going to share with you a step-by-step process to attract love, or your soul mate into your life. This isn’t just based on ‘theory’, it’s built on knowledge and my own personal experience using the law of attraction.
If you follow these steps and are willing to do the inner work that’s going to be required of you, you will become a love magnet and bring to yourself that one special person who was meant just for you.
What is a Soulmate?
So what exactly is a soulmate? And do we have more than one? After many years of research and talking to several spiritual leaders I’ve been given many different answers. The most insightful answer I’d ever heard came from a Buddhist who said to me, “Your soul is as unique as a fingerprint. It is your true essence and part of you, and because it is a part of YOU, then YOU would be your soul’s mate.”
While it was quite insightful, that wasn’t exactly the answer I was looking for. It was true in the sense that your relationship with self is more important than any outside relationship. But yes, there is that ONE special person out there in the world that’s mean only for each of us. The one whom we have a strong connection with that transcends the purely human or biological level.
Soul mates share a deep spiritual connection with one another. They’re not just together today and broken up tomorrow. There is an deniable magnetic pull towards this other person and a bond that becomes unbreakable. It is a definite recognition of two souls that unite and become one again.
And while you may have different opinions or beliefs, you will share the same values.
When you two finally come together, it will be unlike any other relationship you have ever experienced before. Here’s how Rich Bach describes it….
A soulmate is someone who has locks that fit our keys, and keys to fit our locks. When we feel safe enough to open the locks, our truest selves step out and we can be completely and honestly who we are; we can be loved for who we are and not for who we’re pretending to be. Each unveils the best part of the other. No matter what else goes wrong around us, with that one person we’re safe in our own paradise. Our soulmate is someone who shares our deepest longings, our sense of direction. When we’re two balloons, and together our direction is up, chances are we’ve found the right person. Our soulmate is the one who makes life come to life.”
~ Richard Bach
Manifesting Your Soulmate using the Law of Attraction
Step 1: Make a Commitment
We don’t always get what we want or need in life but we do get what we commit to. In order to commit to something, you do it with your entire mind, body, and spirit. That which you commit to becomes unwaivering. You don’t waste time doubting it with your thoughts, internal feelings, or actions.
Commitment has absolutely nothing to do with the other person, it has everything to do with your relationship with self.
First you need to be clear on what kind of person your soul mate is. And by that I don’t mean physical characteristics because the Universal Intelligence often has other plans for you that you’re not aware of, but they will turn out to be better than anything you could have ever imagined for yourself.
I would have never imagined in a million years that my soul mate lived on the other side of the planet, or that he was younger than myself, or came from a very different cultural background… but he was all that and more.
Now let’s say we have this clear picture about the qualities that this person will have. You decide that they are employed, fun-loving, respectful, ambitious, charismatic, creative, has life goals, etc. Now, if this ‘perfect’ person with all of these wonderful qualities were standing in front of you looking back at you, and seeing you the way that you are right now, do you think they’d be proud of what they’re seeing? Would they want to be with you? Date you? Marry you? Chances are the answer to that is no.
What does that tell you? In order for you to attract and manifest your soul mate, you must develop and grow yourself first into the kind of person that you yourself would want to be with. If you haven’t found the right person yet it’s because you’re not being the right person! You must become the person you want to attract.
The process of attracting your soul mate is an Inner Journey. It’s about committing to yourself to becoming the kind of person that you want to attract. You cannot hope to find someone who will respect you if you don’t have real respect for yourself.
In order to attract your soul mate you must be ready to go deep and discover the best gifts that are within you, and only then will you be able to do the same with another person who comes along for the journey of life with you.
See, finding your soul mate is not about finding someone who is going to love you, make you happy, or give you something that you don’t already have. It’s about growing yourself and your own capacity to love yourself first. Without that, you will never be able to love another or accept and recognize their love for you.
It’s about becoming more of who you authentically are at your core, doing the necessary clearing out of baggage and garbage, and embracing all the beautiful colours of who you are or have been unable to look at. When you take the journey of working on yourself, you arrive at a place of deeper intimacy where you are able to fully open your heart and share your gifts with another.
It is a journey of transformation and growth where the two of you become one in conciousness. And along the journey you will find a loving relationship with the person that you are becoming.
So make the commitment right now to take the journey of self discovery and do the work necessary to become the person you most want to attract to you.
Put your hand on your heart and say out loud:
“I, __________ (your name), fully commit to welcoming my soul mate into my life and growing myself into the kind of person that I want to attract.”
Step 2: Create a Clear Vision
Who is your soul mate? They are different for each of us. Close your eyes and bring forth a clear picture in your mind. What do you believe they look like? What are their qualities? What is it that makes them attractive to you?
Typically when we’re out in life and trying to find our mate we embark on a journey of what we ‘do not’ want. Often times we are blinded in the beginning by the colourful masks each wears, but when the mask begins to lose its lustre we start taking notice of all the things about that person that are the polar opposite of what we claimed we wanted. But the reality is that what we focus on most with our thoughts, words, and feelings is what we attract to us.
You need to have clarity and know what you want so that you can identify it when you see it, feel it, and hear it- and most importantly- so you won’t be sidetracked into a relationship with someone who is not your soul mate. There is no need to settle for less than who you truly want. If you are feeling lonely and need to jump on the first person who looks your way then you need to do some more inner work.
You already know what you DON’T want, so start putting your energy and focus into what you DO want in your ideal mate. What type of person will be in complete alignment with your core values, and expresses what you want to experience and share in your relationship?
To get started creating your ideal mate on paper, write out 3 separate lists:
1) Your Soul Mate List: What are the qualities and attributes that you want your soul mate to have? Describe their physical and non-physical characteristics. What kind of person would really make your heart sing? Start with listing whether they are single, straight, gay, available for a healthy relationship mentally, loving, committed to a long-term relationship (or marriage). Do they live close to you or if not, are they willing to relocate for you? Write it all out but don’t get too attached to the finite details because the universe tends to bring forth even better than what you imagined for yourself as long as you are on a positive vibration.
2) The Deal Breakers List: These are the things that you want to watch out for when meeting people. Identify at least 3 qualities that if this person were to exhibit, you would not be in a relationship with them. Possible deal breakers could be if the person has an alcohol or substance abuse addiction, if they’re abusive to others or animals, if they’re already married or in a relationship, if they have a history of not paying bills, etc. What are your top 3 deal breakers that throw off the red lights for you?
3) Your Gifts List: Remember that your soul mate will not be coming into your life to rescue you, to make you happy, or to save your life in any way. Your soul mate is your friend and partner with whom you’ll be sharing your life. A person who will love, nurture and support you while you love, nurture and support them. A person who understands the true power of a soulmate union and will love you even when you don’t feel like you can. This is about you. What are you bringing to the relationship? List out your unique gifts that you will be sharing with your soul mate who will nurture and support those gifts in turn.
Step 3: Send out a Soul Call
Everything in our Universe is first created on the inner plane through ideas and emotions before it is manifested into its material form. Research has proven that people who are thousands of miles away can actually affect one another’s heartbeat and capacity to experience love simply by thinking loving thoughts about each other.
Lovers don’t finally meet somewhere, they’re in each other all along”
When you connect with your soulmate on the inner plane first you draw them towards you and ultimately propel them into your arms.
When the movie Twilight first came out I was in a bad relationship and I remember going to sleep after the movie and dreaming about a guy like Edward in my life. I saw him as being protective and loving and passionate. I started keeping a journal and writing down each of these dream that I was having about this new love of my life. I had dreams of standing in the kitchen of a house I had never seen before, with a man whom I described as being of average height and build, dark hair, hypnotic eyes, and had a calming effect on me like I’d known him for centuries. I’d had dreams of where we would meet, what I would call him, and many other things in extreme detail.
Ironically, without even knowing it, I was dreaming of my soul mate a full year and a half before I’d even met him. And bigger surprise- he was EXACTLY as I’d envisioned him, we met exactly where I dreamt, and the nickname I gave him was dead on as well. We still look back at those diary entries today and marvel at how deadly accurate they were and how magical the universe is at bringing you exactly what you focus on.
In order to send out a Soul Call you can follow these steps:
1) Set your Intention: Write this down or say it out loud: “I now open my heart to my soul mate and I welcome love in.”
2) Open your Mind: You must really believe that he or she is out there, and that nothing can keep the two of you apart. It doesn’t matter where they are right now- they exist and are ready to find you. Say this affirmation and believe it with your heart and emotions:
“My perfect partner is on his/her way to me and nothing can keep them away from me.”
3) Open your Heart: Visualize and FEEL what it would look like and feel like to be with him or her. You most likely already know more about your soul mate than you even realize. You came into this world with certain tastes and preferences that are in alignment with theirs. The law of attraction cares more about what FEELINGS and EMOTIONS you feel than anything else. Feel as if they are already with you and own those feelings day in and day out.
Step 4: Clear the Decks
You must be ready to let go of your old ways of being and embrace the new aspects of yourself that are waiting to emerge. Before you can welcome your soul mate into your life you must begin by clearing the decks. Remove all of the obstacles that are stopping, hindering, delaying, or even distracting you from having the relationship that you truly want to have. Heal your heart, de-clutter your mind, release the past, and make room for love.
1) Heal Your Heart: Each of us has deep emotional wounds either from childhood, from being rejected at one point or another, or from past relationships. You must be willing to clear out all of the past hurts, anger, resentments, and anything else that has helped to build the steel fortress around your heart.
One of the greatest things I can tell you is that the past serves no purpose in your present or future. Holding onto the past in any way only serves to keep you in a prison of your own making. I can guarantee that the person you are harbouring anger and resentment for is not wasting the same energy you are. Stop allowing yourself to be the victim.
Think about the things from your past that you are still holding on to, what lessons are there to learn from the experience? That’s the only thing you need to be concerned with. Learn the lesson, bless the past for providing that lesson, and move on from it. Free your heart from the pain. Forgive yourself and silently forgive the other person for their part in it.
2) Unclutter Your Mind: Let go of any fears or beliefs that you have about love that are keeping your love away from you. What limiting beliefs are you holding onto about yourself or the opposite sex?
– All men are jerks?
– All the good men are taken?
– No one wants me because I’m over 30
– No one really wants a single parent
– If I could lose 50 pounds then I’d be loveable
Dig deep and uncover those limiting beliefs. Make a list of them. Once you’ve created the list, look it over one point at a time and ask yourself if there is any truth to it. If you believe that all men are jerks then you must challenge that by asking the question “have I EVER met a man who wasn’t a jerk?” If so (and chances are you have) then that belief has no basis any more. Let it go. Just like past pains and resentments, limiting beliefs only serve to keep you imprisoned with no purpose.
3) Release the Past: I’ve already touched on this but we’ll dig a little deeper. Are there any past relationships that you’ve had that are still unresolved? Almost every person I come in contact with who hasn’t found ‘the one’ is still either consciously or unconsciously in love with someone from their past still. If you’re still carrying around the other person with you in your heart and mind, how can you expect there to be room for your soul mate? As long as you’re still harbouring feelings for someone else you will never be able to give all of yourself to the one you were meant to be with. It’s time to let the other one go.
4) Make Room For Love: Take a minute to really reflect on this question and answer it with complete honesty. With your life is at it is today, do you have the time and energy for a deep, loving, committed, healthy relationship? Do you have room in your life for your soul mate? Is your lifestyle in alignment with the soul mate that you’re trying to attract? Do you have a bunch of friends with benefits that keep you sexually satisfied? Are you busy working so much that you don’t have time to get out there and date? Are you busy helping everyone else and have no time to care for yourself? Are you so caught up in everyone else’s drama that you’re putting out more negative and repelling vibrations than loving and positive ones? If you aren’t making the time in your life for your soul mate then you are sending out a clear message to the universe that you’re not ready for them to come to you. Does your home scream ‘single life’ or have you physically made room for your soul mate in your home as well?
Step 5: Start Telling a New Story
Throughout the course of our lives we have spent a considerable amount of time thinking the same thoughts over and over again, based on past circumstances and experiences, and the majority of them aren’t truly OUR thoughts. Often times little things trigger thoughts or reactions based on a past experience. We tell ourselves the same old story over and over again about why we have childhood wounds, about how bad a previous relationship was, about how we were dumped unfairly, or how we’re not being loved the way we want to be, or how unequal our relationship is, or how we have abandonment issues, or how we were cheated on, how they were too this or that, how we weren’t good enough, etc. The stories go on and on and on. STOP! You cannot continue to tell yourself the same old story. The more you continue with the story, the further you push your love away and keep them away. Why? Because you are focusing on it.
Everything in our universe is created twice. First in our minds and then in reality. If you question that, look at every invention in existence- it was first an idea or thought in someone’s mind, and then they brought it into physical reality. The more you focus on telling the old story, the more you will attract more situations, people, and events that fall in line with that same frequency. Start telling the NEW story of how you want it to be. The story of what it’s like to be in the most magical, loving relationship with your soul mate. Start catching yourself when you’re chatting with friends- which story are you telling? Are you stuck in the OLD story? Or are you telling the NEW story?
Step 6: Gather Your Dream Team
Life can be challenging at time even for the best of us, we have good days and those that are not as good as we’d like them to be. There are factors that are out of our control and we’re not always going to be at the top of our game mentally and emotionally. Because of this we all need a good support system in our lives that will help us to show up fully, especially when we meet our soul mate. If you bring all of life’s challenges into one relationship, you place a heavy burden on the relationship, drain the sexual and creative energy from it, and end up losing it.
You need to enlist the support of others at times and create your own group of challenging, amazing, supportive friends. Those who aren’t afraid to lovingly tell you like it is and who won’t allow you to play the victim.
If you truly want to grow yourself into the kind of person that you want to attract you will need to cultivate a network of counsellors, healing professionals, coaches, mentors, and trusted friends whom you can count on for any variety of challenges that will arise. You need to be able to show up fully on your journey to attracting your soul mate. Release any old emotional baggage that’s been stored in your mind, body, and spirit, and you need someone to hold you accountable to your commitment, and demand clarity as well as offering gentle support when you need it most.
Include only those who are positive, trustworthy people who genuinely have your best interest at heart. Exclude any friends or family members who are negative, sarcastic, skeptical, and who actually bring you down.
Step 7: Get Ready for Your Soulmate!
Now that you’ve set your firm intention to manifest your soul mate, and you’re on your way to welcoming them into your heart, it’s important that you continue to trust the process and remember that nothing can keep your soul mate away from you. Once you are ready, the Universe will put the two of you in one another’s path and create the right time and place for you to meet. You’re job is only to concentrate on the what and who, the universe will create the ‘when’. Let life flow, remain positive, open and loving and the rest will take care of itself.